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Posts Tagged ‘military’

Already?

13 Sep

It’s getting to be fall already. I can’t believe it’s already halfway through September. My baby is almost six months old — it’s been half a year since I had him. It’s time to start getting ready for Halloween and making holiday preparations. For us, the holidays are still up in the air, considering that I have no clue whether or not Matt will be home for Christmas (thanks, Marine Corps). I have plans for how to handle it either way, but it would be nice to at least know.

Matt told me last night that he thinks he’s going to be leaving advon again for this deployment. I can’t say I’m entirely surprised — for the last deployment, he left advon for not only the deployment, but for every single work-up as well. And he didn’t come home advon for any of them. I had a feeling this was going to happen again, but at least this time I won’t be pregnant over the deployment (I hope, anyways), and we won’t have a deadline for him to get home by. It really did suck to have him gone almost two months longer than everyone else was, though. I hope that doesn’t happen again. The most frustrating part, though, is that I’ve been told that the advon guys will only have around nine days of predeployment leave. That’s not anything that I know for sure, but if it is the case, then I am not a happy camper. It’s not because I’m being robbed of anything, but because my husband is. He’s going to be going to Afghanistan to fight a war — regardless of when he leaves, he deserves a decent amount of leave before he goes. All Marines do.

And since we’re having to deal with planning for a deployment, that means work-ups are starting soon. Matt’s leaving to be in the field shortly, and he’ll be gone for a little while. And this is how it will be until his unit deploys. I’ve known that this deployment was coming since before he even came home from Afghanistan (how’s that for catching your breath?), but I haven’t really been thinking about it. I made some mental preparations earlier this year, I figured out what I was going to do during the deployment to get Ben through it and to get myself and Matt through it, and then I let it go. I feel prepared and ready but… man, how did it get here so fast? It’s still quite a ways away, but at the same time, here we are, getting ready. It’s far away and right around the corner at the same time.

I just feel resigned. Maybe it makes me a bad wife, but I just want to get it over with already.

Meanwhile, I’ve got all these plans to make. It’s Ben’s first Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. And sure, he’s just a baby, but I want to make them special and amazing. I’ve already got his Halloween costume picked out (the cutest little lion costume ever), and I’m excited to get the house decorated for Halloween. I’m trying to decide if I want to have Matt put up the Christmas lights before he leaves, because God knows I don’t know how to do it. He won’t be here for Thanksgiving, so the plan is to have it before he leaves. I’m pretty sure my family won’t be coming up here, so we’ll probably just have our Marine Corps family come over. I mainly want an excuse to make a ton of Thanksgiving food, because let’s face it, there’s really no sense in making a whole Thanksgiving feast for just two people.

And then… Christmas. If he won’t be here for Christmas, then we’ll just celebrate that early, too, but I’m still a little sad that he’ll be missing Ben’s first Christmas. He’ll also be missing Ben’s first birthday, our two-year anniversary, my birthday… he’ll be missing a lot this time. Last deployment he didn’t miss much (well, unless you count my entire pregnancy). It makes me sad, not so much for myself, but for Ben and for Matt. I’m sad especially for Matt. I know he hates that he has to miss so much. When he gets that low, I do my best to try to remind him of what he’s fighting for, and that he’s doing it for us. I have to be his motivation, so I can’t let myself get dragged down. I have to be strong for all of us.

In the good news department, after Matt leaves to go in the field, I’ve arranged for Ben and I to get some pictures done at a local park. I’m going to make a scrapbook over the next few months — a small scrapbook — that will be laminated and everything so that he can take it with him when he deploys. He’ll be able to carry his family with him. I hope he’ll like it.

I still can’t believe that all of this has crept up on me so suddenly. How are we dealing with another deployment already?

 
1 Comment

Posted in Deployment, Marine Corps life

 

Are there any good wives left?

07 Sep

Sometimes, I swear to God I feel like I am the only good Marine Corps wife left.

Obviously, I know that’s not true — I can name several friends off the top of my heads who are wonderful wives and mothers. But as I’ve been floating around USMC wife communities online, I’ve been getting increasingly disturbed. I’ve seen girls ask if it’s cheating to make out with another girl, if it’s OK that they want to send Dear John letters, and admitting that they want to cheat when their husbands are gone because they miss the attention that comes with being in a relationship. And while there’s always a few bad eggs, what absolutely floors me is that there have been throngs of other Marine Corps wives supporting these statements!

If you love your husband then no, it is not difficult to stay faithful while he’s gone. It’s called, you aren’t a wild animal and you control your impulses, so keep your damn legs together while your husband is putting his life on the line defending YOUR freedom. That goes for making out with another girl, too. Call me crazy, but my wedding vows didn’t say be loyal to my husband… unless it’s with someone of the same sex. I didn’t say I would forsake all others, except for people of the same sex. No. I made a commitment, and I swore to be loyal and to forsake all others, til death do us part. That is what marriage is. There’s no wanting to flirt and kiss and hold hands with other guys because you miss being part of a couple. There’s no getting drunk and making out with another girl. What is the point of getting married if you aren’t going to honor that commitment?

And the Dear John letter. I swear, any woman who sends a Dear John letter in my opinion deserved to be publicly humiliated. There is nothing more selfish and cruel and cold-hearted. Your husband (or boyfriend or fiance or whoever) is at war, probably living each day on the hope of coming home to you, and then he gets hit with a Dear John letter? I would ask if these women don’t realize what they’re doing, but I’m pretty sure they do know exactly what they’re doing, and just don’t care. I don’t care what the situation is, but there’s no excuse for it. None. Zero. There is no situation where it is ever acceptable or appropriate to send a Dear John letter to a war zone. I don’t care how dreamy Channing Tatum looked in that Nicholas Sparks movie where it all ended up OK. It’s not OK.

Then there’s the complainers I’ve been coming across. The women who talk about how terrible the Marine Corps is, and how they can’t wait until their husband gets out, and how awful this life is, and blah blah blah blah blah blah blah. To all those women: SHUT UP. You married a Marine. You knew what you were getting into. And if he got into the Corps after you were married, then you still need to shut up. It’s different for Marine wives than it is for civilian wives. Our husbands need our support. Even if you do hate it, keep your mouth shut. I can only imagine how draining that must be to a Marine whose wife is constantly denigrating his job, his service, his calling, and his sacrifices. I can only imagine how soul-crushing it must be to know that his partner, his spouse, the person that is supposed to be there for him through anything, and who is supposed to support him, hates everything about what he does. A person who does that to their spouse must be some kind of selfish, because if you cared about how they felt, you wouldn’t do something like that.

Look, I get that this life isn’t easy. We’re coming up on my husband’s fourth — count ‘em, FOUR — deployment. It probably won’t be his last, either. I have no family that live near here and most of my friends don’t live here, either. But I don’t complain. Know why? Because I chose this life. My husband chose this life. We got into this together and I will never be anything but proud and supportive. He puts his life at risk; the least I can do is stand proudly by his side. Life in the Corps, whether as a Marine, a spouse, or a family member, is not for wimps. If you’re married to a Marine, you find that you just can’t handle it, and your love for him isn’t enough to make you become willing to endure, then there’s the door. Don’t let it hit you on the way out. Nothing is keeping any of us, as wives, in this lifestyle that is hard and challenging and constantly changing. A lot of it isn’t fair and a lot of it sucks. But there’s so much good in it as well. And there’s pride, and service, and honor, and commitment. If all of that isn’t enough, and your husband’s love isn’t enough, then why stay?

What I just don’t understand is why people like this even get married. Honestly — why even do it? If you’re going to be a selfish twat, then don’t get married and you can spend your life focusing on making no one else happy but yourself. And there won’t be the collateral damage that comes with dragging some poor man down because you don’t care enough to take his feelings into consideration.

Marriage is about more than just love. It’s about commitment, honor, respect, dignity, loyalty. I know I still believe in that. What’s sad is that apparently, there are a lot of women who no longer do. And it makes me sick.

 
11 Comments

Posted in Marine Corps life

 

After Irene

30 Aug

Well, we survived Hurricane Irene.

The actual storm didn’t last too long. We lost power relatively early Saturday morning, and watched as tree branches fell around our house and our creek slowly overflowed. Something — we don’t know what — hit the doors of the shed in the backyard, leaving a dent and pushing the doors out of the frame. And the shed itself kept flying up, as if it was going to fly away, and then it would fall back to the ground. So Matt went out there to try to secure it with some sandbags. As he was trying in vain to secure the shed, the wind lifted the shed into the air, with Matt still inside. After that, we said forget the damn shed, and let it go. And go it did, flipping over in the air and landing in a neighbor’s backyard.

After a few hours though, everything pretty much calmed down. A friend of ours, whose husband is deployed, had a few trees fall on her house. Because I had been hearing that several tornadoes had touched down, we had her and her kids come stay with us for a few hours, until everything settled down. And then, it was just time to wait.

Sunday morning, Matt managed to get everything cleaned up, and the shed was put back where it belonged. But we still didn’t have power. We rented a small generator from MCCS, which powered our refrigerator and the television, but we had no air conditioning or hot water. It was so hot in our house, even with several fans going, that we were going outside to get cooled down.

Progress Energy had requested that everyone with a power outage call a hotline to report it, so I did. I also requested a follow-up with a power restoration estimate. Sunday afternoon, I got the estimate: Thursday night at 11:45pm. I almost cried. We thought about getting a hotel or going to stay with one of our friends (several offered to let us stay with them), but we decided to just stick it out. I just couldn’t understand why the power was going to take so long to be restored, though. The area that we live in had almost no damage. There were no downed power lines, no downed trees, no flooding. It still makes no sense to me (which is obviously why I don’t work at a place like Progress Energy!).

Monday, Matt still had to go into work. He had Friday off, but base had power, so the Marines still had to go in. Luckily, Matt has an awesome gunny sergeant who let him leave after formation so he could finish taking care of the house, and try to figure out what we were going to do with our power situation. We considered buying a generator from Lowe’s, but ultimately decided against it. All they had were 7000 watt generators, which wouldn’t even power the AC, and it just didn’t seem like it was worth it. Thankfully, Monday evening around 6:00pm… power was restored!! We were so excited. It was like a godsend.

Now that all of the cleanup is done and over with, life will go back to normal. Well, sort of. Matt’s starting workups for another deployment soon, and of course, hurricane season goes on until November. So I think there’s a very good chance that I’ll end up having to deal with the next hurricane all by myself. Maybe then, I will take refuge at someone else’s house.

 
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Posted in Marine Corps life

 

Preparing for the storm

25 Aug

It seems like everyone is in full panic mode over Hurricane Irene. Me? Not so much. We’re prepared, but not panicking. We’re ready for the storm, but we’re not getting rattled by it. It seems like a lot of people around here are, though.

Matt got off several hours later than usual tonight so that he could help get everything ready in his unit. Marines that live in the barracks were given the option of staying or leaving; the majority of them apparently chose to stay. So my husband had to stay late to help coordinate MREs in case the chow hall closes, fill sandbags, and other things of that nature. This way, the Marines in the barracks are safe. Us out in town, they aren’t as worried about apparently. (Which is fine with me.)

When he finally did get home, we spent some time picking up everything out of our yard that could get blown around and moving it into the garage. And once that was done, we were ready. Hurricane Irene, we are ready for you!

It’s interesting to me that people are so worried over this. I saw a story from Weather.com that called this a threat that no one has yet experienced. Really?? No one in Eastern Carolina has dealt with a hurricane before? Ever? In the history of all hurricanes? Look, no one wants to deal with a hurricane coming, but Irene is far from the worst case scenario here. It’s only a Category 3. The Marine Corps hasn’t even called for a mandatory evacuation, and neither has Onslow County. Everyone should be prepared for what’s coming, but jeez — let’s cut back on the hysterics, folks!

As for us, we’re picking up a generator tomorrow that we reserved on base. It won’t power the whole house, but it will keep the refrigerator going, so if we lose electricity we’ll at least be able to keep our food from spoiling. And we’ll be grilling out in the garage on our propane grill. Add in the candles, and heck, it might even make for a romantic night.

 
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Posted in Marine Corps life

 

Hurricane Irene, please go away

22 Aug

I am so not in the mood to deal with a hurricane right now. Seriously — Hurricane Irene needs to go away. I have enough on my plate to deal with right now without having Mother Nature rear her ugly head.

What’s been going on in our world lately? Well, I’ve been mentally preparing for Matt’s upcoming deployment (not saying when or where to, of course), even though it’s still quite a ways away. Since it is still quite a ways away, I’m in the mindset that I am so ready for this deployment, bring it on, I am going to make it through with no problems and time will fly and before I know it, homecoming will be here, which will be wonderful and magical and perfect. This can-do attitude will probably begin to dissipate the closer the deployment comes, of course.

Ben has been sick for the past week and a half. At our first doctor’s visit, two nurses and a doctor completely dismissed my concerns and brushed them all off as normal. I didn’t really buy it, but I figured, hey, I’m not a doctor. After a few days of not getting any better, I was more than happy to bring him back to the doctor’s office. This time, I made sure we saw our regular pediatrician. And, whaddya know? I was right. Ben has an ear infection. It explains the congestion, the coughing, the constant fussiness, the loss of appetite, and the… well, let’s just say, digestive issues.

Thank God he’s at least still sleeping through the night.

In the good news department, I’ve been the captain of our unit’s kickball team for the wives. There’s a league here on base made up of wives from all different units, and we all play each other. The tournament’s coming up in a few weeks. It’s been a lot of fun, and more importantly, a great way to meet new people. I’ve lived here for over two years now, and I can still count on one hand the number of people I really and truly call friends. I know, there’s the “sisterhood” of Marine wives, right? Yeah, there’s no sisterhood. You make your close group of friends, sure. But do all of the wives band together in the spirit of love and support and togetherness? Yeah right! I wish. In my dreams. Most of the time, I’ve found, when the husbands are home everyone kind of keeps to themselves. I understand why — your husband is here and you want as much time with him as possible before he leaves again. But it’s counterproductive. Because when the men finally do leave, you’re left completely alone and without a support system.

(Get that, ladies? You need to come out of your shells!)

So I captain the unit kickball team, and I’m a family readiness assistant for my husband’s company. It keeps my busy and it keeps me involved. Honestly, I don’t know why more wives don’t do the same. I am not a fan of isolation. I was isolated for most of Matt’s last deployment, and I don’t need to go through it again. No thank you.

 
1 Comment

Posted in Marine Corps life

 

Hallmark Doesn’t Support The Troops

01 Jun

I usually like Maxine. The sarcastic, crabby comic is usually pretty funny. She’s a product of the card company Hallmark, a company I’ve never had a problem with. And I’ve never noticed any anti-American, anti-military statements or actions from her or from Hallmark — until now.

I shopped at Hallmark quite a bit while Matt was deployed. When I found out we were having a boy, I wanted to send him a themed care package with a ton of “Its A Boy!” stuff to surprise him. Hallmark was where I got a lot of those things.

Had I known they would be so willing to disrespect the troops and their families, I would never have spent a cent there.

Monday was Memorial Day. Maxine — and thus Hallmark — chose to commemorate the holiday by running the following comic on Maxine’s official Facebook page:

This insulted and offended multiple military family members, including a Gold Star wife. They decided to express their feelings about the cartoon, and were summarily attacked, insulted, and degraded by the commenters there. After a good amount of time, Hallmark finally issued a weak apology. But it was far from over. Maxine’s fans continued to berate the family members, myself included, who had the gall to express our opinion: that we found the cartoon offensive. Yes, I know, most of America does indeed see Memorial Day as just another day off of work. That doesn’t mean any of us like it, or that we want a cartoon character furthering that sentiment. And this is where it got interesting.

The moderator for the Maxine page got to work. No, whoever it was did not delete the rude, insulting, vile comments directed towards military families. Instead, they were deleting our comments. Comments calling us “inbred hicks” and “retards” were allowed to stand. We were told that we didn’t support the military, that we were complainers and whiners just pretending to be offended, we were told to shut up and go away. We were insulted and attacked for merely expressing an opinion. And Hallmark didn’t delete a single of their comments. (Susan Katz Keating has just a few examples.) This action made it clear: their words said one thing but their actions said another, and that was that Hallmark does NOT support our troops and the military.

Now, this wouldn’t have been as big of a controversy as it has turned into if it wasn’t for this. Imagine being a Gold Star wife and having people insult you for merely saying that you were offended — and that Hallmark decided to side with them. Hallmark could have chosen to delete the comments attacking her and other military family members, but instead, they sided with them and allowed the abuse to continue. Here’s an example of the type of comment that Hallmark endorses:

“Yet I find it very disturbing that closed minded Inbred Hicks have nothing better to do than to trash a Cartoon Figure its a waste of Energy, really people get a grip on reality . Maybe the Bible Belt Inbred’s need to do something for their country than sit behind a computer & complain get a life seriously.”

That is simply inexcusable in my book. They censored dissenting comments while allowing insulting personal attacks on military families to continue. I can’t see how a company that supports the military would ever let that happen. Susan points out how the situation got worse and worse, and how Hallmark has even visited her website — but still has done nothing.

Stalwart troop supporter Carrie Costantini jumped into the discussion and tried to educate the Maxine fans on why the cartoon was offensive. Carrie even gave a tutorial on what Memorial Day actually is, and what it means to people who have lost a loved one in combat. The Maxine fans hooted ever louder. Their responses showed them to be people who care very deeply about when their new Keepsake Ornament catalogs will arrive, but not at all about telling a Gold Star mother to “get a life.”

Despite the fact that “Maxine” frequently responds to people who leave comments on the page, Hallmark allowed the dialog to continue unmonitored. The Maxine Brigade grew increasingly snide, belittling, and hostile. Anyone who objected to the cartoon was cast as a whiner, or stupid, and worthy of extreme mockery.

This extended “Hallmark Moment” continued much of the day.

I posted a couple neutral questions, myself, asking Hallmark to respond to the complaints. “Maxine” remained silent. I posted again. Still nothing. Finally, I questioned whether Hallmark would have been willing to use a different holiday in place of Memorial Day in the cartoon. What if, for example, the Maxine character joked about Martin Luther King Day. Within minutes, Hallmark removed my questions. Then they surfed into the blog and read a couple posts.

Are we all overreacting? I’d imagine that people without skin in the game might say yes. But as a Marine wife, this is insulting to me. I refuse to shop at Hallmark from now on and hope that everyone who reads this does the same. I sent Hallmark the following message expressing my displeasure — I have yet to receive a response. I encourage everyone reading this to also send a message of their own. I sincerely hope that word gets out about this and that Hallmark comes around.

Our troops and their families have sacrificed too much to be disrespected this way.

To Whom It May Concern:

I am writing to inform you that you have lost a Hallmark customer. On Memorial Day, you published an offensive cartoon from your character, Maxine. The text was as follows:

“Lots of people don’t have to work today. Which is why my motto is “Live every day like it’s Memorial Day!”

This was offensive to many people, including myself and some Gold Star families. I know many of the people who commented on Maxine’s Facebook page to express their disappointment. All of them are supportive of the military beyond just complaining on a Facebook page, as your fans would have you believe. It’s bad enough that most Americans view Memorial Day as a day only for a three-day weekend and barbecues. It’s even worse that Hallmark would further this idea.
After many of us posted that the cartoon offended us, Maxine fans responded extremely crudely. They attacked us, including a Gold Star mother. The page moderator did nothing. We were insulted, told to shut up and go away, and still the moderator did nothing. After a while, Hallmark issued a rather weak apology. However, they still took a stand against the military. Comments from military families who were offended were deleted. Comments from fans attacking military families, though, were let stand. Some of these included being called “inbred hicks”, “retards”, and much more. Why were comments from military families — respectful comments — deleted while vile, crude insulting comments directed at said military comments let stand? Clearly, the company apology was not sincere. Actions speak louder than words, and your actions clearly show that not only does Hallmark NOT support our troops and respect the sacrifices of the fallen, they actively side with those who disrespect and insult our troops and their families. This situation could have been handled differently, but Hallmark made a choice and took a stand. You chose which comments to delete and which comments to keep, and the comments you chose were vile, rabid, insulting, and disrespectful. Apparently those are the customers you value — not our troops and their families who are sacrificing for your fans to have the right to insult us.

My husband is a United States Marine. He recently returned home from his third combat deployment, this time to Afghanistan. We learned that I was pregnant shortly before he left. Throughout the deployment, I sent him several items from our local Hallmark store, including multiple “Its A Boy!” items that I put in his care package to let him know we were having a boy. If I had known that Hallmark had such little respect for our military and those who made the ultimate sacrifice, I never would have spent my money there. And now, I will never spend my money there again. We lost five Marines and a corpsman on this deployment. Memorial Day is not just a day off of work for me. Their sacrifice should be honored, and if Hallmark cannot do that, then they do not deserve the patronage of military families.

Sincerely,
Casandra Chesser

 
4 Comments

Posted in Uncategorized

 

Remembering Our Fallen

30 May

My husband and I just got home from visiting our hometown of Jacksonville, Florida. Often, on federal holidays, Camp Lejeune gives Marines and sailors a 96 — four days off. We went home, and Matt finally got to have his coming home party with all of his old friends, and our friends and family also finally got to meet our baby, newly arrived the day after Matt returned home from Afghanistan two months ago. But I couldn’t stop thinking about the fact that on Memorial Day, we would have literally no time to do anything to honor the fallen today.

I hear Marines often quip that they are at war, and America is at the mall. And every Memorial Day, I’m reminded that in large part, it’s true. Memorial Day is supposed to be a solem, somber day. It’s supposed to be a day to honor and remember the sacrifices of our fallen heroes, the men and women who gave their last full measure of devotion to their country in the name of freedom.

Instead, it’s become just a holiday that gives us a day off of work. It’s a day for BBQing, for beer; a day to go to the beach or to the pool. Maybe there will be a parade with some veterans or servicemembers. But remembering the fallen? Honoring their sacrifice? For far too many Americans, it simply doesn’t happen.

I remember Matt’s last deployment to Iraq. He had called me when two of his buddies had been killed; I believe it was the first time anyone he had known had been killed. I couldn’t see him, but I could picture him. He was yelling into the phone, practically incomprehensible with grief and rage. He repeated, over and over again, that he wanted to find the [expletives] who did this and [expletive] kill them. On the other end of the line, I felt completely helpless. My heart was breaking for him, and I didn’t know what to do or say. There are no words comforting enough for that kind of situation.

Two months ago, he returned home from Afghanistan, and we lost more Marines. Not too long after my husband had left last August, I got a phone call from one of our friends. Her husband is Matt’s best friend, and is with 2nd Battalion, 9th Marines. He had deployed about a month before Matt did. She was crying into the phone, and for one sinking moment, I thought her husband had died. Instead, she was passing on some bad news: a mutual friend, Sergeant Jesse Balthaser, had been killed in Afghanistan. His girlfriend was pregnant with their child.

I would have to pass the news on to Matt when he called home next. I was sick with the thought of it; he called that same day and I almost immediately started crying — probably not the best way to break the news, but I hated what I had to tell him. He was upset, but took it well and spent most of the phone call reminiscing about Balthaser and telling me about him. Balthaser had wanted to join the Marines in high school, so much so that his parents had to sign paperwork to let him enlist while he was still in high school. This was his third deployment. He stepped on a roadside bomb, which killed him instantly. Matt told me about his sense of humor and how he played guitar. He told me that he liked being the center of attention and always made people laugh. He said that whenever you were around him, you couldn’t help but be in a good mood. He lifted everyone around him up.

I didn’t know what to think about the fact that he took the news so much better than before. But eventually, as a Marine, you start to adjust. And Matt’s unit, 1st Battalion 8th Marines, didn’t escape their share of casualties. Considering they were deployed to Helmand Province, a major hot zone, it wasn’t surprising. But it didn’t make it any better.

The first was Lance Corporal Joshua Ose.

He was killed by small arms fire while on patrol in Afghanistan. He had only been there for about two weeks. Like Balthaser, he enlisted while still in high school. His parents described him as an adventurer, an outdoorsman who loved to hunt with his dad and was always taking risks — like jumping off of a bridge in his hometown into a river swollen by recent rainfall. He was a gun enthusiast, and would play paintball on a local farm with his friends. He played for two days before he left. His family has a history of military service going all the way back to the Civil War, and Josh felt strongly that serving his country was something he needed to go. He believed in the Marine Corps and he believed in the mission in Afghanistan.

Next, we lost Hospital Corpsman Edwin Gonzalez.

He died after a roadside bomb exploded during combat operations. Doc Gonzo, a newlywed, was nicknamed Superman and had a huge “S” tattooed on his chest. His friends gave him the nickname after he was in two car accidents, and both times came out without a scratch. He served with his high school’s JROTC. His friends plan on meeting the sixth of every month to remember him (his birthday was February 6th), and to honor his life — not his death. He became a corpsman with the dream of eventually becoming a doctor.

We then lost Lance Corporal Raymon Johnson.

Lance Corporal Johnson died after he stepped on an IED. Being a Marine was his dream. His family did everything they could to convince him not to enlist — even taking him to Walter Reed to see the wounded soldiers there — but he could not be dissuaded. His twin brother, Ramon (a soldier in the Army), described him as someone that always lit up the room whenever he came home. One of his friends named her new son after him. Marines with 1/8 saw him as someone they could trust and open up to, someone who would look out for them. He was described as motivated and an inspiration to the Marines around him.

Next to fall was Staff Sergeant Javier Ortiz-Rivera.

Staff Sergeant Ortiz was married with three children. His wife said that he was dedicated to his Marines and was proud of them. He had started a Bible study in Afghanistan and said that he was blessed to be deployed with the men he was serving with. He was a devout Catholic and had been an altar server. He had talked of serving his country since he was a child. One of his friends reported that he had proclaimed that Jesus Christ died on the cross for his salvation; he would die for his country to keep his family safe.

Staff Sergeant Stacy Green was the next to give his life.

Staff Sergeant Green had been serving in the Marine Corps for ten years. This was his fourth deployment. In high school, he played football and helped lead the team to win their state championship game. He was the life of the party, someone who was outspoken and always made everyone around him laugh. His brother said that he loved being a Marine, and that it changed his life. He was described as someone with courage and character. He was engaged to be married.

Finally, we lost Lance Corporal Jose Hernandez.

Lance Corporal Hernandez loved being a Marine. He followed his younger brother into the Corps after graduating high school. He died after stepping on a land mine. His childhood dream was to join the Marine Corps. He had a way of making people laugh, even when they were sad, angry, or scared. He had a big heart, and was someone who knew what he wanted in life and went for it. He wanted to serve his country. Hernandez would have turned 20 the week after he died.

These are just seven of the countless servicemembers who have given their lives for their country. These are just our fallen. Today, I hope that you’ll see their names, look at their faces, and read what is just a small fraction of the lives they led. So often, we turn the fallen into nothing more than a man in a uniform who became a hero. We need to remember not just the sacrifices they made, but the lives they lived and the people they were. Take the time to remember the 6 men we lost from 1/8, to remember Balthaser, and everyone who gave their lives so that we could be free.

 
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Posted in Marine Corps Heroes, Military Heroes

 

Brilliant: Pentagon considering allowing family visits at Gitmo

12 May

What could go wrong?

The Pentagon is considering allowing the families of detainees at Guantanamo Bay to visit them, an unprecedented step to ease the isolation of inmates who in some cases have been held at the U.S. facility for close to a decade, according to congressional aides.

The International Committee of the Red Cross (ICRC), which monitors conditions at the military prison in Cuba and facilitates videoconferences between detainees and their families, has been in serious discussions with the Pentagon about a visitation program, the aides said.

Some Republicans, after hearing about the talks, appeared to balk at such access to the Guantanamo Bay naval station. In an early version of the annual legislation to authorize the activities of the Defense Department, Rep. Howard P. “Buck” McKeon (Calif.), the chairman of the House Armed Services Committee, inserted language that would ban family visits, which have never occurred at the prison.

But the latest version of the bill states only that Defense Department funding appropriated for fiscal 2012 may not be used “to permit any person who is a family member of an individual detained at Guantanamo to visit the individual.”

That would not rule out a visitation program underwritten by the Red Cross.

“My efforts are aimed at protecting U.S. personnel at Guantanamo and sensitive national security information from being compromised,” McKeon said Wednesday. “Allowing family members to visit detainees at Guantanamo Bay would create major security concerns for our nation.”

Gee, you think?

Now, I’m not in the military, and I’m certainly no expert on military intelligence or national security. But I can’t see any reason whatsoever that we would need to listen to the Red Cross on matters of national security, which is exactly what any policies concerning Gitmo are. One of the major benefits of Gitmo is that it is an isolated location. The prisoners there are dangerous men, terrorists and enemies of the United States. Allowing family members to come visit would be a huge risk and would absolutely create national security concerns. I’m flabbergasted that the Pentagon is even considering this.

 
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Posted in Marine Corps News

 

Hysterics Over DADT Repeal Are An Insult To The Military

21 Dec

Originally posted at David Horowitz’s Newsreal:

There have been a lot of different responses to the news that Don’t Ask Don’t Tell has been repealed. President Obama is planning to sign the bill this week. Supporters are touting it as a victory for civil rights. Before the Senate passed the repeal, critics continued to voice concerns, including the Commandant of the Marine Corps. Some have continued to voice those concerns — others, however, have taken those concerns one step too far. At what point does concern turn into hysterics, and when does it becoming insulting to our honorable men and women in uniform?

My husband is currently serving in Afghanistan in the Marine Corps. He loves his country and the Corps. His MOS — military occupational specialty — is an 0311, an infantry rifleman. This is a combat MOS. Like many Marines, he wasn’t a fan of repealing DADT. The number one concern I have heard from many Marines around Camp Lejeune was how the repeal would affect unit cohesion, although there are many other issues that come into play. The benefit of DADT has been that it allows the military to remain neutral on homosexuality. Now, the military will have to reconcile service with the gay rights agenda. How will the military now be forced to handle a gay soldier in a relationship? Will they be forced to approve of gay public displays of affection? What about those in the military who aren’t comfortable with their children seeing two men kiss while they’re doing their grocery shopping in the commissary? How will the military be forced to handle a gay soldier who gets married in a state that allows gay marriage? Will gay spouses receive military benefits now, too? And what about the gay servicemembers who aren’t married because their state doesn’t allow it, but are in committed relationships — do they qualify for benefits, too? Will gay and straight servicemembers be allowed to sleep in barracks together? What about when a unit is deployed, and the men are forced to sleep in even closer quarters? What will happen to the soldier or Marine who is uncomfortable with sleeping next to a gay man?

There are a lot of questions and concerns about repealing DADT, and no easy answers. The beauty of the system was that it allowed the military to remain neutral on each and every one of these issues. The military didn’t approve or disapprove. Now, the military is forced to take a stance, and in many instances, I fear it will be in favor of gay rights, giving special treatment to gays. I also am not a big fan of politicians using the military to basically conduct a social experiment, especially when we are fighting two wars.

Obviously, I am not a fan of repealing DADT. My feelings on the matter were very close to those of General Amos, the Commandant of the Marine Corps. However, now that the repeal is passed, there is only one thing to do, and that is accept it and move on. Adapt and overcome. While there will be many tough decisions to make, and the adjustment period will undoubtedly be difficult, I have no doubt that our servicemembers can and will adjust. Adapt and overcome.

Today, I logged onto my Facebook, and saw the following in my inbox.

Change your profile picture to black to mourn the death of the United States military as we know it.

How widespread a meme this is on Facebook, I don’t know. But it’s far from a rarity. Joseph Farah, as an example, wrote an article trumpeting the “fact” that servicemembers will be apparently be quitting the service in droves, so upset will they be over the prospect of — gasp!! — serving alongside gay men and women. He’s even urging them to do so. Apparently, there are some people who just can’t fathom that our men and women in uniform might actually be honorable people who will be able to rise above sexual orientation. This infuriates me.

There have been many people expressing a similar opinion, and I find it to be a massive insult to our military. The rhetoric — on both sides of the issue — has been massively overblown.

The question I have for the people who feel this will destroy our military is this: do you think all of the men and women currently serving are so severely homophobic that they cannot continue to serve their country with honor?

If your answer to that question is yes, then shame on you.

General Amos has pledged to support the repeal, doing the honorable thing. (Funny how so many of our servicemen and women tend to do that, huh?)

“Above all else, we are loyal to the Constitution, our Commander in Chief, Congress, our Chain of Command, and the American people,” said Commandant Gen. Jim Amos, in a prepared statement released Sunday.

… “As stated during my testimony before Congress in September and again during hearings before the Senate Armed Services Committee earlier this month, the Marine Corps will step out smartly to faithfully implement this new policy. I, and the Sergeant Major of the Marine Corps, will personally lead this effort, thus ensuring the respect and dignity due all Marines.

“On this matter, we look forward to further demonstrating to the American people the discipline and loyalty that have been the hallmark of the United States Marine Corps for over 235 years.”

Gen. Amos disagreed with the repeal and fought it every step of the way. It passed anyways, and so he is putting service before his own objections. Many Marines, soldiers, sailors, and airmen will likely do the exact same thing. This must be shocking to the people who think so little of our military that they won’t be able to survive serving alongside gay men and women. (Imagine how shocked they would be if they ever found out that many times servicemembers already know who in their unit is gay, and don’t care.)

As of right now, the military will be writing the rules on the new policy. And so far, it looks like many of the concerns I, and many others, have are being addressed.

No public displays of affection. No separate bathrooms. No harassment and no special treatment.

… What if a recruiter refuses to process recruits who say they are gay? What about a sailor who requests a new sleeping area to get away from a gay roommate? Can a service member file a complaint against a chaplain who preaches against homosexuality? And can a gay or lesbian service member get leave to travel home when their partner is ill?

In each case the recommended process is careful and deliberate. The recruiter and the sailor should be counseled about the new rules — but in both cases commanders have the authority to approve a move if they believe it’s necessary in order to maintain unit stability. And, yes, chaplains can still preach what they believe.

The health and social benefits, however, are a murky area that Pentagon officials say they are trying to work through.

In some cases, service members may be able to designate a same-sex partner for benefits. In most cases, however, they are treated much like unmarried heterosexual couples. So, same-sex partners will probably not be able to share on-base housing, and commanders don’t have to make allowances for same-sex couples when making duty assignments around the globe.

Does this mean all the questions are answered and the concerns are addressed? No, but it does look like this is being handled (for now) the best possible way. Perhaps we should wait to go into a rabid panic until there’s actually a reason to panic, and we aren’t quite there yet. Unless, of course, you have no faith in our military.

Why is it so unbelievable that the military would be able to figure out the best way to implement homosexuals serving openly? As the wife of a Marine, I find it deeply insulting to our men and women currently serving with honor to suggest that the mere addition of gay men and women will somehow make our entire military crumble. Understand this: the vast majority of heroes in uniform are better than that. The few that are not won’t last.

The New York Times recently ran an article interviewing a handful of Marines. Most of them, not surprisingly, were just fine with the repeal, although they expressed some reservations about — you guessed it — serving in combat. (Personally, I wouldn’t let the final word on that be several boot Marines who haven’t even graduated yet from the School of Infantry.) My guess on the combat situations? Yes, there will be reservations and the men will be uncomfortable. But if the gay troops prove themselves in combat then I guarantee that those reservations will disappear. When you’re fighting the enemy, you aren’t worried about who the guy next to you is sleeping with. You’re worried about whether or not he’s a good shot and if he’ll have your back in a firefight.

Our troops have been able to defeat some of the worst kinds of evil throughout history. When our country was founded, our military started with a small band of ragtag patriots who were able to overthrow an oppressive empire. Since then, they’ve encountered unspeakable evils and enemies that seemed impossible to defeat, and have come out on top almost every time. We have the greatest military the world has ever seen, yet a small group of people set on hysterics over the DADT repeal would have you believe that this same military can’t overcome gays serving alongside straights.

What an insult to our men and women in uniform, who as I am writing this are fighting thousands of miles away to defend our country and our freedoms from another unimaginably evil enemy. They deserve better.

Our troops have overcome much worse than the repeal of DADT, and given time, they’ll adapt and overcome this too. It’s too bad that we can’t have the faith in them that they have earned, and so richly deserve.

 
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Posted in Commandant of the Marine Corps, DADT, Marine Corps News

 

Military Moms: Fighting the Good Fight?

09 Dec

Edna Stern is a guest blogger for My Dog Ate My Blog and a writer on online schools and universities for Guide to Online Schools.

There should be no other women more respected in this country than military moms. These brave women watch their sons and daughters ship out to the most anti-American corners of the world to spread freedom and fight for the American way, knowing that some of them won’t come back. Losing a child is a mother’s greatest fear, but many military moms continue to support their beloved children in their endeavors out of an amazing sacrifice for their country.

However, a growing number of military moms cannot separate their personal interests from those of our country, especially when their children’s lives are at stake. In fact, there are quite a few who are staunchly outspoken against the war while their sons and daughters are actively serving this great country overseas.

How can a young soldier face the daily challenges of fighting in an unpopular war, knowing full well that he or she does not have the full support of family back home? By allowing space for doubt in their children’s minds, military moms against the war may be putting even more lives at risk. A distracted soldier does not perform at his or her best.

The irony here is that most military moms are supportive of their child while they watch him or her rise up through the ranks of the military, enjoying the perks and benefits of a steady paycheck, health care, and education, only to become vocal detractors after their son or daughter is deployed overseas.
What all moms should remember is that their children have trained for the day when they get the call, and they are ready to make sacrifices, sometimes even the ultimate one, for the country that has protected and provided for them since birth.

Moreover, it is the mother’s role to stand strong, especially when her child occasionally doubts the integrity of the mission. We are fighting for democracy and justice. We are fighting for those who lost their lives during 9/11. We are fighting for those who have made the ultimate sacrifice in the name of protecting the United States of America. Soldiers eat, breathe, and live this fight. They were born ready for it. Why question and criticize government initiatives that compensate soldiers for doing what they know is right?

Military moms who are outspoken against the war are more often than not worried for their children, which is only natural. It is an amazingly difficult thing to see a child leave in uncertainty, not knowing what lies ahead in the future. But it is also a beautiful sacrifice, one any mother should be proud to make. Those who cannot see it as such have lost the patriotism and dedication that they worked so hard to instill in their children.

 
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Posted in Marine Corps life

 
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